Okay i've posted this elsewere and got a few good responces, but
nothing over the top that would actually help me on my daily decisions.

For the most part this topic is made in an attempt to get some feedback
on things i do daily, and if they should be done differently, i really do
need some input on this because sometimes i run out of ideas and thoughts
on what to do and what chances/actions i should take.

Some of you know i own a company down here in FL, i also manage 2 other
very demanding companies, specially prior/after hurricane season, which is
a roofing company. For the most part i find myself not giving enough
"attention" to my employees, and their needs. Sometimes i have no
idea what to say to some of their simple problems, may it be financial
and/or family problems which are carried over into the work enviroment.

I'd rather not get involved in some of the things i'm asked, specially things
involving their personal lives, and sometimes i feel so empty/cold when i
turn away from them when they ask me for opinions and so forth.
I feel like its none of my business, but yet i feel like i should contribute,
but i dont on the mostpart and that makes me feel somewhat selfish for
not doing it so.

Sometimes i cannot have chit chats with them because i need to go out
and get jobs and satisfy the costumers, but i know i could scrap up some
time to spend at my shop with my guys and try talking to them.

I might have the wrong prespective on things, but i honestly dont know
what approach i should take. Am i taking things too serious? Should i even
care at all about their personal business, even if they come to me with
thoughts and ideas? I'm afraid i could have some say in their actions if
i tell them something, and therefore i could maybe screw something up
up in their homes depending what i say. Should i continue to just tell them
that i'm not the right person for them to come and ask for opinions? Or
should i change the way i treat them on that subject and be a little more open?

I don't mistreat them or anything, but i just dont like to tell them what
i think sometimes, specially when they come tell me how family isnt doing
good, or this & that. dunno what to do...

Any suggestions?

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An important thing about being a boss is that you are the boss, ppl just dont come up to you and shoot the shit and just talk talk talk. There is a thin line though on how to treat your employees, be super nice and possibly let em walk over you, or be the asshole noone likes. I think being a mix of the two would be good for you. Just start out with the "how are you doing today" kind of stuff, nothin in depth/life changing, then as you get more comfortable w/ your employees start opening up a bit. Just make sure you dont get to the point where yall are friends, because thats when some disciplin(sp) problems, you try and tell em whats up and they are like "but you are my friend kiotosan"

But then again, "if its not broke, dont fix it." If your employees are happy and working fine, might just wanna stay the same

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They are working fine, but for exemple, i have this guy that is the 3rd
time he comes into my office and asks for a advice. I ask what i can
help him with, and he starts telling me how he isnt being a good father
to his son, and not being a good husband and he doesnt know what to do
and this and that. I tell him that i'm only 19 years old and i havent had the
chance to be a father or married, but he insists in hearing my opinion.

All 3 times he has talked to me about it, i have told him i dont know what
to say, but i do have opinions about it from things i see/hear but i dont
wanna say anything because i dont know how it might effect him.

I dont know, its not only this guy... Fernando which is another employee
has a huge money managing problem, and he has asked me loans quite
a few times. I've loaned him about 5k, and i see i'm not gonna be getting
any of it anytime soon. I dont wanna fund his addictions or whatever it is
that he spends money on, but i dont wanna see him starve.

I dont know if my actions are reasonable or not. I'm a overall decent
boss, i'm rude at times but i'm a usual down to earth guy when it comes
to my employees. I've yelled before, but only when it was needed.

I dont know, i guess i'm at a situation where i just have to deal, and there
isnt a real solution or a safe-proof thing i can do.

Thanks for you're input though Gavin.

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Here the thing kioto, you've set yourself in there mindset as their leader. So because you employ them and tell them what to do they look at you for answers. Bossy or not. Sometimes people want to hear an answer from you. Besides that since they work with you, people tend to want to become your friend also. I think you should say something, even if your heart isn't 100 percent into it. Effort sometimes really means alot.

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Job 10: 20
The mikey's have a plan. Djay isn't all powerful.

Oh yes Mikey, i've though of that, but what if i say something that will
make them unconfortable? I don't want any conflicts, i dont want any
loss in performance, and i deff. dont want any grudges.

The owner of both the roofing and the granite companies is my good uncle.
Not only we are family, but we've been good friends for quite sometime,
so my relationship with him is far different then a relationship of my
employees and i. I'm very new to these things and i dont wanna screw up,
i dont i'll stumble upon some rocks, but i dont wanna fall when i stumble
(if you know what i mean). My uncle hasnt been in-office for a month or
so, i've been practically dealing with everyone/everything on my own,
and to have some hard working guy quit on me because of something
i said that shouldnt have been said, isnt something i want to happen.

Maybe i will just stay quiet.

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well there is a big reason why people in charge generally do not speak , nor really socialize with people in the work place. Getting close to people like that makes them think they can get away with things lol. I know its harsh to say but sometimes it is a good idea to stay away. But then again everyone needs help sometimes

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Job 10: 20
The mikey's have a plan. Djay isn't all powerful.

Oh yeah, that brings a good point. I dont want them to take advantage
of me being nice, or trying pulling a fast one one me.

Yeah, i'm probably just gonna keep doing what i've been doing.

Thanks Mikeyness.

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It's pretty cool they're coming for you for advice, I think. If they insist on your opinions I would try and give them the best answer you could. I think a boss should be personable, and most importantly, relatable. Like, you could have a boss that was super nice but so utterly fake that it was see through, or you could have a boss who was legitimately real, and not acting nice to you in a condescending manner.

If you feel that you could scrap up time to talk to them I would. Just don't act smarmy and feel you're trying to be nice to "underlings". Just talk to them on an equal level and everything and I think everyone would be more satisfied.


My advice is worth nothing btw haha.

not like i said it first or anything, thx for raining on my parade

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i don't read anything YOU say haha

I took that idea from you Gavin, not raining on anything

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