God Damn Ye Greedy Gentleman
By Scott Small


(To the tune of "God Bless Ye Merry Gentlemen ")

God Damn ye greedy, gentlemen
The R-I double A
For suing all your customers
For downloading Coldplay
To make us buy songs D-R-M'd
Not knock-offs from eBay
O letters of Cease and Desist
Cease and Desist
O letters of Cease and Desist

From off the internet we get
Songs of variety
Stations owned by clear channel
Play crap like XYZ
And those no-talent lip-syncers
Jessica and Ashlee
O letters of Cease and Desist
Cease and Desist
O letters of Cease and Desist

The lawyers sue while in DC
The lobbyists do pay
For WinMX and eDonkey
To make them go away
Bit Torrent and Kazaa are next
to get what will convey
O letters of Cease and Desist
Cease and Desist
O letters of Cease and Desist

But the CD sales will not rise
When after peer to peer
has gone the way of the Dodo
And to law we adhere
Cus they are still pumping out
That crap like Britney Spears
O letters of Cease and Desist
Cease and Desist
O letters of Cease and Desist

Now uploading is not right
Musicians deserve pay
So go and see you favourite bands
When they're in town to play
Don't post songs to the Net or
you'll get in your in-tray
O letters of Cease and Desist
Cease and Desist
O letters of Cease and Desist

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Gandalf, The Grey-Robed Wizard
By Scott Small


(To the tune of "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer ")

Gandalf, The Grey-robed Wizard
Had a very naughty ring
He got from old Bilbo
Via Gollum and a now dead king

Gandalf gave it to a hobbit
Frodo was that hobbit's name
Who set out to destroy it
And again would never be the same

Then one dark and stormy night
Gollum came to say:
"Frodo has my precious, right?
I think his finger I will bite."

Then all the elves adored him
as they all set out to sea
Gandalf and Frodo Baggins
you'll go down in history!


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I'll add more as I find them, enjoy!

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Silent Geek
By Scott Small


(To the tune of "Silent Night ")

Cooling Fan, thermal paste
All is cool, in my case
Rounded cables increase air flow
Cathode lighting makes it all glow
See the heating decrease
See the heating decrease

CPU, Underclocked
That I bought from Overstock
Heat-pipes stream from in where they start
Exchanging the heat as they depart
All to download free pr0n
All to download free pr0n

Silent Sam, MS Flight
Dungeon Keep, Jedi Knight
Games I can play after the upgrade
Installed on a disk configured with RAID
Belongs to you, all my base
Belongs to you, all my base

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